Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve been talking more and more about saying yes. One of my friends was in town this past weekend who I hadn’t seen in years. She mentioned that she tuned in to my Instagram Story about being a ‘yes’ person. So, I thought I would recap and add to it a bit on here! To start, saying yes will change your life.
A couple years ago, I was in a rut. I had just moved back to Dallas after being in Louisiana for the past four years. In Louisiana, I had made so many friends and had the time of my life. Coming back home, I knew it was going to be different because those people weren’t going to be here, in person, with me, but I was up for the challenge. I mean, how hard can it be to make friends and establish an ‘adult’ life? I had moved states once before knowing no one, and it was so easy to make friends… Well, I was wrong.
I didn’t’ realize how overwhelming trying to find a job, fit into a new city, and find friends would be. I was in a relationship at the time and felt like that was the only person I was in Dallas with. Because of that, I would retreat back to my safe spot, with the same one person, in the same area. When the weekend would roll around, I had my plans set. This whole time I was wondering why I wasn’t making new friends and why I felt so alone… I unknowingly separated myself from what I really wanted.
When people would ask me to hang out, I would feel reserved, and eventually kept up this streak of saying ‘no’. It got to the point where ‘no’ would be the first thought on my mind. Deep down I wanted to say yes but didn’t know how to. I know it sounds so easy, but being in a ‘no’ rut can feel captivating. If you’re unhappy right now, check and see if you’re in a rut of saying ‘no’. If you are, decide to make a change. Remember, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
So, I decided to start saying yes – to people, to plans, to experiences, whatever came my way, I was going to be there. I was so nervous at first because I was so out of the loop, it felt uncomfortable. But, being uncomfortable signifies change and change is good! Every time I said yes, I didn’t doubt my decision once I was there – I always had the best time and I was happy doing it. Soon, that ‘no’ thought process switched and now everything was a ‘yes’ from me.
I got on Bumble BFF and met some other girls who had just moved to Dallas as well, reached out to old high school friends, and to some sorority sisters that had moved here. My thought process before committing to ‘yes’, was that it would be so out of the blue it would come off weird. Writing that out sounds so silly. If ‘weird’ is the only thing keeping me from making new friends, then call me weird. I had to remind myself that all people really want in this life is to be loved. What person doesn’t want to feel wanted? If someone I met once years ago reached out, I’d be so flattered they remembered me. So, don’t let that stop you – remember, everyone wants a connection!
This past weekend my friend was telling me that one of her friends always says no to plans, so she’s stopped inviting her places. But, she always asks me because she knows I’ll be there. The more you say no, the more people already know what your answer will be, so they cut you out of the loop. Be the person that’s always there for the good memories, because that’s the majority of the things we remember anyway.
Another one of my friends this weekend was talking about how she met her significant other. One of her friends, who she only happened to be friends with for a hot minute, asked her to go out. One of his friends asked him to go out. Neither really wanted to go but went anyway. If either one of them wouldn’t have hung out with those friends or had decided to say ‘no’ that night, they would have never met.
It’s honestly crazy how one small word can impact your entire life. One plan that you make, one person that you meet, one time you say no, can all change the outcome of your life.
So, be a ‘yes’ person. I promise you’ll make more memories, have more laughs, and create more relationships than you had before!
Shop My Look